From Nathan Allred, former student

From Nathan Allred--8 years old (as dictated to his mom)

Mrs. Bilderbeck was my 2nd grade teacher last year. She gave us a lot of work and expected a lot from each of us. It was hard for her to go from teaching 5th graders to teaching 2nd graders. She loved us though. We worked hard through all the work together.

I'm going to miss Mrs. Bilderbeck, but I know that Heavenly Father has taken her home to Him so that she can rest. This is His way of saying "You've worked so hard here and you are so tired. Here. Come back to me and I'll let your exhausted body finally rest." We can miss her, but we shouldn't be sad for her. I know she's not sad! She's probably up there teaching all the little kids who have died how to read and write and do horrible fraction problems! And, all those little kids are probably complaining and wondering why a teacher had to come to their part of heaven and make them come inside from just goofing off.

But, they'll all love her too, just like we did.

I love you Mrs. Bilderbeck!

Love,
Nathan

From Christian Brill

John [and José], I am so sorry to hear about your mom. She was always so kind and welcoming to me - friendly when I spent the night and even indulging our hours of frisbee playing in the field next door. The last time I saw her was probably in 1993, about two years after you had left Fayetteville. She was kind enough to drive you all the way to Albuquerque where we were staying in a hotel while traveling through. I think we had dinner and tossed a frisbee in the parking lot for old times sake. It was so great of her to listen to our pleas and make a trip on a weeknight just so we could get together for a few hours. I know you have many wonderful memories and I hope that is providing some comfort too.

From Kathryn Dolan

You asked for memories of your mom and I would like to share a few. I found a french language book once at your house and asked your mom about it. She spent time talking to me about the challenges of learning a new language and how interesting it is to visit a different country. I remember thinking how exciting her life was and thought it was nice how she encouraged me to continue pursuing a foreign language, even though it was tough.

Another time you had a bunch of us over to watch a movie. She made popcorn and food for us and talked with us about school. She prodded you a few times to offer to get us something to drink. I think you were annoyed that us feminists could get our own drinks! But she gently said, "Johnny, do your guests want something else?" I laugh thinking about it now.

There was a dance we all went to--Joe, Mitschke, Heather, Annika, you, me and Mike Hammond. We met at your house and your mom took lots of pictures. I still have one. She's not in it--but I remember her telling all the girls how nice we looked. She set us up in your living room and then told us to have fun.

These are all simple memories, regular everyday happenings and may seem insignificant. But when reflecting, it occurs to me your mom was just always there. She was happy to be involved in your life, know your friends, and welcome them into your home. It's a loving parent that not everyone has. I can't offer advice on how to deal with such a loss. But I can say your mom was a wonderful person who raised two very kind and intelligent guys. I am sure you would credit her with much of your success. She deserves that praise because it was clear how much she loved you and José and how devoted she was to your happiness.

From Karen Hunter

Zulema was an inspiration to us all and I will forever be blessed having known her. I met her when the Bilderbecks moved to Las Cruces at a soccer game that the boys were playing in for Mayfield. She wasn't like the other parents who all sat away from the students. Not Zulema, she was unique and always wanted to chat with us. She sat with us girls at the soccer game which was what she was, one of us girls.

I have wonderful memories of going to the Bilderbecks on many occasions during high school. Zulema and John always made it a welcoming home we all took comfort in. Though we all grew up so quickly and left Las Cruces as quickly as we could, every holiday when everyone was in town we would still go over to the Bilderbecks' house just like we did in high school to hang out. Zulema would want to hear how we were doing and what we were up to. It was special because she cared so much about each and every one of us. The last time I was able to see Zulema was last Thanksgiving. She was still her amazing caring wonderful self which is how I will always remember her.

She will be forever missed and an inspiration to us all how she lived her life with such direction and compassion.

From Yahaira Chanlatte

I was on Zulema's second grade team last year. We were so excited about having her back on our team this year, especially after she decided NOT to go back to fifth grade. She was an integral part of our team, and it just will not be the same without her. We loved her very much and admired her, both as a person and as a teacher. She gave so much of herself, and we would always encourage her to at least take some time for herself. But even when she took a day off, she would be in the school assessing her kids to meet some deadline. She will be extremely missed. My thoughts and prayers go out to your family.

From Eileen Gutierrez

Zulema was a wonderful teacher and friend. What an incredible inspiration she was to us all and I know that I will miss her deeply. She brought a lot of joy and laughter to our building and I am forever thankful.
Thank you Zulema for teaching us.

Eileen Gutierrez
University Hills Elementary

From Jan Morehead

I had the honor of serving as Zulema's New University Supervisor when she did her student teaching at Desert Hills Elementary School. Zulema was also a student in the Early Childhood Education class I taught.
She was an incredibly gifted and talented person. She had this wonderful smile and loved life. I was not aware of her passing and I am so sad. My life has been blessed by this incredible woman. I will miss her, but memories of her will live on in my heart.
My thoughts and prayers go out to her family.
Jan Morehead
Desert Hills Elementary

From Kim Bartlett

I absolutely LOVE this picture!! That is SO Zulema!! A beautiful smile and such a zest for life!
I am so thankful that we were all able to spend time with her during Christmas. It was fun to get her outside of the house, to laugh, share stories, share hugs. I am trying to find the photos of us at dinner. I will try to post those soon!
Much love and happy memories...Kim

Zulema´s Life

You knew she was different just from her name. On March 7, 1956 Zulema Xenia Bilderbeck Coca de Brathwaite was born on the windy barren plains of the Bolivian altiplano, in the tiny military outpost of Corque, Oruro. By the end of her life she had lived across Bolivia, in Malawi, Africa, and across the United States before settling in Las Cruces, New Mexico as a dedicated mother, daughter, sister, wife, and teacher.

Zulema was the fourth and middle child of seven born to Jose Coca de Zabalaga and Hilda Coca de Brathwaite. Her father was a captain in the cavalry as the military ventured across the Bolivian hinterlands to build new towns in the wilderness. The family moved frequently, from where she was born in the highlands (above 12,000 ft!) to where they eventually settled in the thick jungle lowlands. She would tell us wild stories of how her father could sharpshoot animals from a moving horse or how boats would capsize while trying to cross wild, swolen rivers. Once the family settled in her hometown of Montero, and as she grew up, she would have more stories of her own.

As a child in Montero, she and her brothers and sisters led a rambunctious life. Imagine her scampering onto a moving truck to steal sugarcane, or climbing a guava tree and passing fruit down to her brothers. The kids would play epic games of hide and seek in the town plaza and tell stories in the streets until nightfall.

Throughout it all, Zulema Coca was a marimacho, a tomboy to the core. She always played soccer with the boys, and was the first pick on her brother’s team every time. She eventually went on to organize a girl’s soccer team in high school, and even the local boys came out to cheer for them. While in many respects she had an idyllic childhood, at the same time she took on adult responsibilities at a very early age.

At the age of eleven, she resolved to live financially independent from her father. After school she would work various jobs like selling popsicles and sweets to the neighborhood kids or helping her mom bake bread. In her early teens she held secretarial or accounting jobs with real responsibilities. Her brother still remembers her practicing typing drills at lightning speed on the typewriter at home. Over time she earned enough to support herself and more. She would help with expenses around the house and paid to put her little sister through private school. This was when she was sixteen. Later in her teens she stood out at her high school. She served officially as class president, but more significantly she was a passionate activist for her community. Whenever school funding was in jeopardy, she took to the streets and went so far as to organize several angry roadblocks in protest to make sure the authorities didn’t mess with her school.

A few years later, at one of her accounting jobs, she met John Noble Bilderbeck at the agricultural cooperative where she worked. After a long courtship, they married in Bolivia in 1975. Soon after, she gave birth to their first child, Jose Hermann Bilderbeck. She was several months pregnant with their second child, John Arthur, when the family moved to Boulder, Colorado, where he was born. This move marked the first time Zulema had been out of her country and away from her extensive supportive family. She felt this burden at the same time she was learning a new language, new customs, and learning whom she could trust in the United States. After more than 31 years of living away from her family, the pain of leaving her home in Bolivia never left her.

Although she always missed her home, Zulema Bilderbeck was not one to look back in regret. As a wife and mother, her stories continued on. In Malawi, Africa, she taught the local women how to fry plantains like they did in Bolivia, which opened up an entirely new source of income for the community. With the family, she experienced countless adventures in the wilds of that country, mudbogging in an old Toyota Landcruiser, evading elephant charges, or fishing her kids out of rivers and lakes that they probably shouldn’t have been swimming in.

When the family returned to the United States, they settled in Fayetteville, Arkansas, where she continued to raise her growing sons and started to pursue a degree in Accounting. Her university studies repeatedly stalled, however, for the sake of always being there for her children. It was in Arkansas that she discovered her love and talent for teaching young children at the local Montessori school. Eventually, the family moved yet again to Las Cruces, New Mexico, where she saw her two children graduate from high school and move away from home.

She was fiercely proud of her two boys, and in the years since they left home, she was with them for their proudest moments. On a trip to Alaska to visit John, she took on the outdoors like she did anything else: absolutely fearlessly. She walked Jose down the aisle for his wedding to Erica Bilderbeck, and together with Erica’s mother she united the two of them with a traditional matrimonial lasso. Her children lived far from home, but she always held them close in her heart.

For all the time in Las Cruces, however, Zulema had many other children to take care of: her students. “Mrs. Bilderbeck” taught for many years at the Immaculate Heart of Mary Catholic School, and later, at Sunrise Elementary, Desert Hills Elementary, and University Hills Elementary. In every classroom, she always put her entire being into her teaching, mixing respect and character with love and laughter for each of “her kids.” There must be hundreds of children and parents in Las Cruces who appreciate the love that Mrs. Bilderbeck put into her work as an educator and mentor. Her family, including her mother from Bolivia, was so immensely proud of her when she crossed the stage to receive her degree, with honors, in Education, with a Dual Language endorsement, in December of 2007.

In the summer of 2009, Zulema Xenia Bilderbeck went home to Bolivia to visit her family. She desperately needed a vacation and time near her mother and family. On this last visit home, she visited old friends, and laughed with her family about old times. She attended her little sister’s wedding, and spent many days and nights in the kitchen helping her mother cook like she used to do. When she fell ill, her family was with her for every day and night. Her two sons were able to see her before she passed away, and when she passed, the same family was there for the two of them. As all of us mourn our immeasurably profound loss, we must remember that Zulema Bilderbeck lives on through the force of her spirit and strength, which runs through her family and all of the children, colleagues, and friends that knew and loved her. We hope you will always keep her alive in your heart with your own stories and special memories.

From The Mystic Odes of Rumi

Rumi was a 13th-century Islamic poet and mystic who had amazing insights on life that still resonate today. I have been reading this poem every day. I hope it will bring some comfort to others who loved her. AEL

At every instant and from every side, resounds the call of Love:
We are going to sky, who wants to come with us?
We have gone to heaven, we have been the friends of the angels,
And now we will go back there, for there is our country.
We are higher than heaven, more noble than the angels:
Why not go beyond them? Our goal is the Supreme Majesty.
What has the fine pearl to do with the world of dust?
Why have you come down here? Take your baggage back. What is this place?
Luck is with us, to us is the sacrifice!...
Like the birds of the sea, men come from the ocean--the ocean of the soul.
Like the birds of the sea, men come from the ocean--the ocean of the soul.
How could this bird, born from that sea, make her dwelling here?
No, we are the pearls from the bosom of the sea, it is there that we dwell:
Otherwise how could the wave succeed to the wave that comes from the soul?
The wave named 'Am I not your Lord' has come, it has broken the vessel of the body;
And when the vessel is broken, the vision comes back, and the union with Him.

Memorial Service

The memorial service will be held at the Sierra Vista Community Church at 2 p.m. on Saturday, August 15th.

The church is located at 514 N Telshor Blvd. Las Cruces, NM 88011.

map

Contact Info

Email: words and wheels(one word) (at) gmail (dot) com

What You Can Do

Memories
We encourage you to share your memories, stories and pictures on this blog by sending them to words and wheels(one word) (at) gmail (dot) com.

Funds
To honor Zulema Bilderbeck, University Hills Elementary has created a fund to supply dual language textbooks in their classrooms and classrooms across the city. To contribute to the fund send a check made out to the University Hills PTO to:
University Hills Elementary
c/o University Hills PTO
505 S. Main Suite 249
Las Cruces, NM 88001